Finkle Truckers Cap
You there, Ogre, are you sick of everyone describing your head as resembling a half-sucked mango? Face like a dropped pie? Boy have we got the solution for you. With these spunky new Trademutt melon protectors, all the attention will be taken away from your Chevy Chace and instead, you’ll be copping questions like, “wow, where’d you get that sweet hat” and “gee, do you think you can turn the volume down on that awesome hat?” to which you’ll respond, “No Bethany, I can’t turn the volume down. It’s supposed to be loud enough to start conversations just like the one we’re having now” to which Bethany will reply, “Wow, where did you get it?” To which you’ll reply, “It’s TradeMutt. The loud prints are designed to start conversations about mental health and make an invisible issue impossible to ignore” Where it goes from there is completely up to you. But be prepared for some real shit.